Remember that last post you read? The one that said I was avoiding you? Well I've REALLY been avoiding you.
Why? Because I'm lazy. And because I have no motivation. And because I'm disappointed in myself. Because guess what happened? Everything that happens every other time...I get stuck in a cycle of self destruction.
Remember those high hopes I had at the beginning of this blog? Oh...those were the days.
Let's see...what have I been doing since the last time I wrote? NOT EXERCISING. EATING CANDY. MORE NOT EXERCISING. EATING PIZZA. Did I mention not exercising? I seem to be forever in a cycle that I can't break out of.
The one thing I did promise myself is I would be honest through out this, right?
*whispers* I'm pretty sure Im sabotaging myself because I'm scared. Don't tell anyone, K?
Because what happens if I get to the gym and I fail? Then not only will I be the fat chick, I'll be the fat chick who tried to be skinny and couldn't cut it. And you thought nothing was worse than being the fat chick, didn't you?
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9 years ago
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you got to pick yourself up and keep going. I've been where you are. I am where you are. I just decided I need to keep pushing even if I fail. You CAN do it!
ReplyDeletePanny, you are #BatShitBrave. I couldn't write something like this until it was fifteen years down the road and I knew how the story ended.
ReplyDelete>>>> not going anywhere without you <<<<
Thanks ladies. You're right...I just have to move on.
ReplyDelete